Lessons

Life is always trying to teach us something. Where would we be if we stopped learning?

"Yep, got 1-10 down pat now thanks teacher. I'll be right now"

After having a weekend sick in bed, I had time to reflect on what I have been learning lately, especially in the last 4 weeks of 12WBT because when I think about it, I feel like a whole heap about myself has changed. And the best way to acknowledge it is to share it, so here is my post I put in the 12WBT forum this morning:

WHAT 4 WEEKS HAS TAUGHT ME.....

I guess it's not only 4 weeks since we had pre-season before that but after having a disasterous weekend (will explain later) I had an opportunity to see just how far I have come.
Before beginning 12WBT I was an overweght 32 year old mother of 2 who was in denial. When I was younger all I needed to do was to go for a walk or head to the gym a couple of times and I could eat whatever I wanted and thinking about it now, I don't think I ever weighed myself. I can't honestly tell you what I weighed. But as long as my size 10 jeans fit, there wasn't a problem. Not that I thought I was thin though...the worst part of looking back, beng slim and not realising it at the time.
But after marriage (I know I was 63kg when I got married) things started to settle down and although my hubby loved the gym for some reason it wasn't something that we both went and did. Working full time and looking after a house and a husband just begame my focus. Learning to cook all these yummy, creamy decadent dishes for my man was much more fun!! But, then the kilos started to come...then my first baby.  Not that I can blame him for putting weight on while I was pregnant, I was so sick I lost weight! The problem for me, both times, is the eating that happens while breastfeeding, and not reigning it in once the brestfeeding stopped. So all of a sudden my portion sizes, and stomach size was huge!
I'm not a psycologist, but maybe it is somewhere in the lack of sleep/baby brain/mothers guilt where the true emotional eating sets in and takes a hold. When was it exactly that I could not live without a mars bar and coke in the afternoon? I don't know. But it happened and continued for the next 8 yrs.
I have lost weight with other programs before. I have had bursts of regular exercise. But nothing seemed to be able to tie it together and make me SEE what I needed to do for me and also for my family....until now.
So here I am. The newest version of me who understands a whole lot more about what I need.
Firstly, I am worth it and I love myself. This right here, is a milestone because it wasn't so long ago I couldn't say that...at all. I am a much happier and nicer person to be around. I am in control of what I do. I make a conscious decision about what I put in my mouth..good or bad. I understand their are consequences for my actions. I love feeling my fitness improve and not feeling previous injuries. I cook daily and want to. The best part is that my kids love the food. This has been such a huge battleground in my house. If I have to eat out, I am looking for the best options immediately and grateful when I find them. Not secretly hoping I won't. I am excited about the future not burying my head in the sand. I miss training and the way I feel after if I am unable to do it. So much so that I cried after missing out on climbing Mt Lofty over the weekend. (I have come down with my first bout of Tonsilitis ever! Bad timing) I am becoming the kind of person I would like to be. A Genuine, Woman of her word.
So that is what 4 weeks has taught me. I'm so excited about what I will learn in the next 4!!!


Dont forget to keep on learning, and most importantly keep learning about yourself!
xx